Thursday, December 21, 2006

Toy Story

Times Square is absolutely insane right now...4 days before Christmas, tourists shopping, workers carring Yankee Swap (we call it Nasty Christmas) bags and food trays for holiday parties, construction seemingly on every block....just a complete mess. Strolling through this morning, I saw a party of five of out-of-towners: mommy, daddy, overweight 9 year old boy and his two slightly younger sisters....mommy had them parked on the northwest corner of 44th and Broadway, giving them a wayward lesson on early morning television:

Mom: "Guys, this is where they have the Today Show! You know the show where they have signs...and they stand outside and people wave! You know, the one we watch at home....come on, with Al Roker? We watch it all the time! Let's look in the windows and see if we see anyone famous!"(editor's note: there is clearly nobody in the building. No cameras, no other fans, no humans of any sort)


Meanwhile, the 9 year old boy is screeching "Toys R Us! Toys R Us! Toys R Us!" at the top of his lungs. Hey mom, first of all, you are standing in front of ABC's Good Morning America set. Matt Lauer doesn't work here. Second, you've got your three lovelies mesmerized by the largest Toys R Us on the planet directly across the street. You could be introducing them to Jesus Christ Himself and it wouldn't alter their stupor. This is their big moment; it's like there two outs in the 10th and Gary Carter is coming to the plate. Let them in the freaking store.
(Sorry I couldn't type the backwards "R". My keyboard doesn't have that....)


1 comment:

Clarke said...

Good stuff.

"Here it is, heart of New York City, Times Square. Named (pause) for the, good times you have when you're in it. Most people when they come to New York, they go straight to the Empire State Building. That's pretty touristy, (shakes head disapprovingly.) I come here. Great places to eat. We have Bubba Gump's Shrimp, Red Lobster down there, you know. This is the heart of civilization right here."

-Michael Scott